Kratzen
Proudly presents…

What is a Furry?

with ♥ from Froge

Introduction

I wrote this e – mail in three hours to my mildly quality writer friend Owlman, whose website design ignores the mantra of “the less clicks, the better” and dumps sixteen links on the first page (the actual first page, not the fake homepage which is practically redundant), which he immediately scalped for his own article. Oh, I can’t believe you’ve done this!

I’m not mad that you’ve “stolen” my content. Sorry, I meant “““““stolen”””””, because the idea that you can “steal” infinitely – reproducable materials is just fucking nonsense, and in fact I wanted him to post the e – mail. I’m mad that he posted it instead of his own furry article which I’ve been checking the page for three days to see! I’m doubly – mad at the poor typography. Right rag? In this day and age? And what’s up with the markup? Are closing tags too hoi polloi for the delicate tastes of the English peoples? This is why you avoid site generators, kids.

I should have known it would come to this. The foreshadowing was as obvious as the day you posted that article about the furry who was accidentally brought to the dog park and was arrested for wearing an illegal coat of arms. Then you started posting about your fursona and your gay boyfriend, and espoused your vore fetishes for all to see. I didn’t even know you were that stretchy! And what’s this about DOOM, anyway? Everyone knows the only good shooter game is Counter – Strike, because being good at a game where your bullets don’t shoot where your gun aims makes you better than all those casual XBOX kiddies who would rather play DOOM wads than be invited to TI3.

I suppose I couldn’t expect any better taste from somebody who recommended The Emoji Movie, and — oh, hold on I just got a court summons for libel. Really? The vore fetish didn’t do it for you, but The Emoji Movie was so vitriolically hateful that you want to censor that from my blog? Apparently I can call somebody a cock – juggling thundercunt on the Internet and that’s okay, but talking about somebody who said “If that doesn’t sound the most 😁 😁 😁 movie ever, I don’t know what is!” is apparently valde malus. Only one thing left to do: petition the Unicode Consortium for a dab emoji and clown on some memestars. Didn’t I make serious posts in the past? Nah, son. Dab emoji.

To avoid gilding the lily, I didn’t make any edits or additions to what is overall an excellent introduction to the weird and wonderful world of furry nerds, as said by the frog who wrote the thing. I will disclaim that it was written at 01:00, by which point I was sleep deprived as all hecky and so didn’t bother with any ideas of cohesion, fact – checking, or even editing it as I wrote it. As Walt Whitman allegedly said, “first draft, best draft”, and I can’t argue with my bisexual brothers. It may be full of anecdotes, half – truths, full – truths, blatant lies, or any combination of such. Of course this is true of everything you read online, though you can trust me. Unless you don’t, then get off my hell off my site.

What is a Furry?

I suppose if one is going to designate a significant portion of their live researching something they know nothing about and will only ever be able to describe it on a surface – level analysis due to never being a part of the culture or being a part of any other splinter culture that would help you understand just what’s so appealing about our community, you might as well cover the one that the mainstream media has made us seem like a bunch of sex – depraved freaks who fuck in mascot costumes.

To wit, only 13% of furries own the typical mascot “full fursuit”, where 25% of which own a “partial” which is significantly cheaper, considering a full suit would be around $3,000 with the highest – end ones costing even more. You could theoretically get one for under $2,000, but you always get what you pay for considering how niche of a market there is and the craftsmanship skills required — especially for online work where you can’t even measure your subject.

To clear up misconceptions, you need sources. The problem with furries is that most of them don’t ever contemplate what it’s like to be a furry — they just enjoy it and that’s that. The premier independent source comes to us from our friends at Ontario, called the Fur Science Furbook. Yes, I paid taxes to make this happen. It one of the most lucid scientific tomes ever devised, with facts from not only furries, but from weeaboos and sports fans, making for a tome that provides a blinding insight into every subculture you could want. From the personal (such as kinks and fetishes) to the obscure (such as facial recognition testing), there is nothing this book lacks for. Fun fact: the cat and rabbit on the cover are called “Echo” and “Justice”.

Anything not from a website is either from Fur Science or from my own experience, though I will limit the latter, because apparently I’m not a “reliable source”. So we might as well ask the big questions: who, when, what, and why?

Who

The furry community, in contrast to most other ill – defined fandoms, congregate almost exclusively within a few websites and so are extremely easy to spot in their natural habitat. These websites being FurAffinity, SoFurry, Inkbunny, and e621, all of which contain pornography. FurAffinity is the oldest and is used out of tradition for almost all furries, SoFurry is vastly less popular (especially among artists) though remains a standby, Inkbunny is newer and is seen as a haven for pedophiles and any content you can imagine (though is also popular among regular artists for it’s laissez – faire attitude towards censorship, e.g. there is virtually none), and e621 is the dumping ground for all furry art whatsoever, provided it’s: 1. drawn artwork. 2. of a minimum quality standards. 3. not pay – per – view or otherwise prohibited for redistribution by the artist.

In terms of what these websites do, they all host art. FurAffinity is the largest (with DeviantART being the old favourite), Inkbunny is the newest, and e621 just archives everything. e621 is the only one small enough where everybody knows everybody else, and the other websites are more of a “follow your favourite artists” type of deal, rather than discussing the art itself. Also, the site Pixiv is known for hosting exclusively Japanese art, virtually unused by Westerners due to its foreign interface and Japanese – exclusive userbase.

There are also sizable communities around Twitter and Tumblr, though you have to search around seeing as a lot of the blogs are pornographic and are usually in their little filter bubble. Most of the profiles are non – cringey and are of actual reasonable human beings who just enjoy animal art, though Sturgeon’s Law applies in full force. Yes, there are roleplayers whose culture is a mystery even to me, though they mostly congregate around the fetish – listing site F – list (NSFW obviously) to find potential roleplay partners. Such roleplayers may also appear on Facebook, IMVU, or Second Life to a lesser extent.

One thing you will notice is that, like the weeaboo culture, pornography is a massive, massive part about being a furry. 43.5% of male furries regularly view furry porn, sharply declining for women, meaning that they’re even more lustful than the anime fandom which is unashamed to make everything big – titted or otherwise “cute”. By no means are all furries in it for the porn. In fact, it’s a self – deprecating joke that all furries are horny forever alone perverts with no ambition but to get gangbanged by 17 werewolves in public. But going into this culture requires understanding that, yes, there’s going to be porn.

Furry porn almost always get more views than regular artists, and those who do both NSFW and SFW art are those most successful and profitable artists. Indeed, the furry community has an extremely strong artistic culture, which relies on a lot of wealthy commissioners who flash their cash around to artists they enjoy. These aspects of the furry community is well – known to all furries, though sadly unappreciated by outsiders. The whole of furry culture lives and dies on artwork: without it, we would be dead. There is hardly any “furry” traditional media, unlike that of anime fans, and next to none created by actual furries. We are unique in that our entire fandom is based on what we, ourselves, have created, and not that of any other entity.

The most popular furry artists? Literally does not matter. There are no “cults of personality”, at least none I have seen, and so furries tend to appreciate different styles and as such follow artists who produce those styles. e621 is notable for being the Darwinist’s favourite website: the most popular content will be upvoted and favourited into the hundreds, leading to a great boost in publicity to the artist who earns consistently high rankings. Note: bronies and Pokémon fans are not considered furries, at least not canonically. The distinction is largely arbitrary and based on personal preference.

For what it’s worth, I like Trout, Zenirix, Blitzdrachin, Scorci, Autumndeer, Crackers, Felino, Pedrovin, Goshaag, Jurassiczalar, Shane Frost, s1120411, anything on 10kb, and yes, they all do porn (except for those last two, because they’re good boys and girls). Some of them do exclusively porn! I can’t even list some of my favourites because their porn is so out – there and would damage my reputation (even though my fetishes are vanilla as all hell). No, you don’t have to look up each and every one of those accounts. Like I say, the individual artists do not matter in the face of the collective culture.

Don’t look for “mainstream” furries. There are almost no mainstream publications or works that are by anybody calling themselves furry. Blatant furbait such as “Dust: An Elysian Tail” or “Erma Felna: EDF” are all written by your regular Joes… don’t even get me started on Maus. As in Las Vegas, baby, everything that happens within the fandom stays within the fandom, including the dirge of webcomics that are so easy to produce (just take your pick. the most well – known SFW ones are Better Days and Sabrina Online, while the most acclaimed would have to be “Ozy and Millie” or “Lackadaisy Cats”).

You might get a YouTuber like Adam from YourMovieSucks who is incidentally a furry (NSFW), or a writer like Froge (yours truly dumbshit) who is quite possibly the least cringy lowkey furry the fandom has ever seen, even though in actuality I’m your typical example of what the fandom might call GAY GAY GAY, given my affinity for catboys and catgirls in cartoonish styles alike. Mostly I like cats. And birds.

If you need more insight into furry culture, just ask around. Furries tend to be either socially depressed or extremely extroverted; everything in the middle is boring, and you are likely to not get a response from furries who feel you are trying to solicit them. As with life, it helps to have a reputation, plying your craft and commenting on every post of every artists you like. Ironically, you might have more success and more insightful advice from those with less reputation within the fandom; scout around for anybody with “art whore” on their FurAffinity page, and they might talk to you about what they like. If they’re a commissioner, they will be used to talking to strangers!

When

This one’s simple. The furry community developed in the early 90s, based on the foundation of science fiction and mainstream media produced in the mid – 80s, as Usenet allowed those with an interest in anthropomorphic art to get to know other such fans. Furry conventions started to pop up, role – playing was in its infancy, and online “MUCKS” (“multi – user chat kingdom”, nominally) solidified the fanbase into a resilient subculture. The influence from sources such as Disney and indie comics were paramount to this development, and it was an inevitable one; indeed, one might say that if furries did not exist, it would be necessary to create them.

Things got really funky in the 2000s. The Web was booming, and suddenly everybody could have their own little space to discuss their philias in. Webcomics sprouted up like weeds, the 2005 – created FurAffinity became the Mecca for furries, and we even got a 2003 CSI episode that focused exclusively on the sexual aspects of the fandom, a stereotype that has not been dispersed fifteen years later.

I joined the fandom around 2014 when I coincided with Tumblr, and before then in 2010 I became one of those oldfag bronies who actually browsed the 4chan threads when that fandom was in its infancy. Bronies are actually pretty important in the development in furries; it’s a big gateway series due to the distinction between the two culture, as well as creating more liberal ideas of the types of media one is allowed to enjoy.

Indeed, bronies allowed young men to enjoy little girls’ cartoons and get away with it, ballooning into the cultural revolution of the New 10s that encouraged everybody to take down their “no fun allowed” signs and be chill about kiddie media such as anime, cartoons, and comics, which then splintered into the related ideas of self – expression such as gender and sexuality. Are bronies really to blame for our social justice revolution? They couldn’t have hurt one bit.

As a consequence of bronies being absolutely everywhere, furries became more noticed by comparison. Where before 2010 you couldn’t don a furry avatar without being ridiculed and harassed, nowadays nobody cares whatsoever, except for those basement dwellers at 4chan of course.

Furries are rapidly gaining traction, especially since the 2015s, as a subculture as well – known and omnipresent as your typical weeaboo ones. Of course we’re much smaller than them — you have to walk before you can run — but the writing is on the wall, and the younger generation is joining in much greater numbers than ever before.

Thanks to a combination of furries being on popular social networks such as Tumblr and Twitter, furry art diversifying from typical traditional talent into modern “toony” artwork, and more and more works such as Five Nights at Freddy’s, Zootopia, Undertale, and Bendy and the Ink Machine, massive amounts of attention and talent have been brought into the community, and as a culture grows, it grows fast. You see, there are going to be even more and more works that furries and non – furries will latch onto, and when they arrive, the fandom will just get bigger and bigger.

In the year 2017, furry porn can gain thousands of notes on Tumblr in a short span, and regular furry work can gain even more thanks to the widespread appeal of Pokémon, Animal Crossing, and other funny animal games. The differences between furries and non – furries are blending, with the old guard becoming less and less relevant, with new artists taking up the vast majority of artwork. Indeed, most of the popular artists around right now have started after the brony craze in 2012. If that isn’t a sure sign of our popularity, I don’t know what is.

I, for one, cannot wait to see what will happen for the future. As anime influences the mainstream culture right now, one day it will be furries. What will happen after that? Hah! I have a whole lifetime to find out, and it has been proven to me this is one beautiful world to live in…

What

Like I say, without artwork, the furry community is dead. As a result of which the majority of our time in the fandom is just looking at furry artwork and talking with other furries. That’s pretty much it: no series to watch, no big shows to latch onto, and even fandoms like those of Zootopia and Five Nights and Freddy’s tend to assimilate into the general furry population.

Of course those fandom artists don’t have to, and there are those who have been exclusively drawing works fro those series for over a year, but most artists are more general than this. Also, whenever you complain about the next big fandom that comes along and invades all your favourite sites, it helps to keep in mind these are the fandoms who are keeping furries alive. Where would we be without Undertale, Zootopia, My Little Pony, and FNAF? As obscure as we have been for decades! Whether or not you want furries to die out is kind of irrelevant at this point. It has been demonstrably proven we have no intentions of doing such a thing, with thirty years of evidence backing us up.

When it comes to the porn, a lot of furries find it preferable to regular porn, with one Reddit commentator saying “people are gross”, and another one saying “furries don’t eat, poop, or make any smells that you aren’t attracted to”. My theory is that the level of abstraction between reality and art allows porn to have an astonishing impact, which is only amplified when it is further abstracted from the use of funny animals. Frisky feral animals usually just appeal to our love of cute things; the actual amount of “zoophiliac” furries is ill – defined and unknown, ranging from 2% to higher than “one in six”s

Don’t look for “mainstream” furries. There are almost no mainstream publications or works that are by anybody calling themselves furry. Blatant furbait such as “Dust: An Elysian Tail” or “Erma Felna: EDF” are all written by your regular Joes… don’t even get me started on Maus. As in Las Vegas, baby, everything that happens within the fandom stays within the fandom, including the dirge of webcomics that are so easy to produce (just take your pick. the most well – known SFW ones are Better Days and Sabrina Online, while the most acclaimed would have to be “Ozy and Millie” or “Lackadaisy Cats”).

The vast majority of furry pornography has nothing to do with bestiality or zoophilia; those that do are abstracted by making the feral animals intelligent on the levels of human, or are otherwise fictional creatures such as Pokémon or Digimon (a practice amusingly titled “Poképhilia” or “Digiphilia”). Yes, fictional depictions of realistic bestiality can be easily found, but you are simply not going to find anything as offensive as say, /r/bestiality unless you’re really looking for it.

Furries are, frankly, not interested in the real – world sexual characteristics of animals beyond appropriating them for fictional artwork. There are a lot of horse cocks, but all the horses are cartoon characters. Same for feline and canine cocks… there is an odd cultural double – standard where it’s acceptable to have realistic male genitalia, but significantly less so for females, because female genitalia is seen as too bestial for the tastes of most furries. It’s a stigma I support, as I hate seeing “anatomically correct” furry work, which lends itself to zoophilia.

The question of whether fictional human – on – feral – cartoon – animal is legal has yet to be answered, as are those questions of human – on – anthro and human – on – drawn – actual – animal – bestiality. I saw an episode of Border Patrol of a fursuiter having his computer searched for illicit materials and pornography, so if a furry wants to be safe, it would be best for them to not have any humans in their porn whatsoever. Indeed, many a Tumblr account has been nuked for this reason.

“Cub” art remains popular, to the despair of normal human beings everywhere. This ranges from “they – look – young – but – they – really – aren’t”, to “borderline underage teenager”, all the way to “this is unambiguously a child what the fuck are you doing”. For what it’s worth, e621 explicitly states “Adults that look young should rarely, if ever, be tagged young“.

e621 is liberal when it comes to tagging things as “young”, where images where it is entirely possible everyone is of legal age are tagged because someone looks a bit too adolescent for the tagger’s taste. When it comes to issues such as age of consent of fictional cartoon animals with no humans involved, context is important. If it obviously looks like a child, there’s nothing you can do to justify it. But if they just look like young adults, it’s pretty much a non – issue, so don’t think about it too much.

As for other fetishes or philias, you’ll see them as you go along, including your ever – beloved vore fetish. It helps to try to justify these fetishes from a rational standpoint so you don’t go crazy trying to understand why somebody would be attracted to balloons popping, tearing apart stuffed toys, seeing liberal amounts of slime, or being bound up and drowned in a gimp suit. As the participants are likely to be funny animals, it will soften the blow compared to real – world fetishes thanks to the power of abstraction, and so it’s a good community to do research about such fetishes.

I am forever disappointed in the niche status of plushophilia, easily one of the cutest, innocent, and yet most bizarre fetishes I’ve ever seen — the perfect one to have, and to the point, the perfect one to make people cringe with. Personally I love mine to death, having always been there for me when nobody else has. What more justification do I need than to love something that was designed — and to the point, deserves — to be loved? Also, a lot of the community is autistic. Oh, snap!

My second favourite one would have to be candy gore, though only for the æsthetics. Basically it’s over – the – top ultraviolence put through a filter of candy – coated glee, where you get all sorts of blood and guts, only this time the blood replaced with syrup and the guts replaced with candy. It’s one of the most unique things I’ve ever seen, and I’ve fallen in love with the style. We need a video game like this… one with so much gore in it that it becomes a fetish rather than an artistic statement.

Taking a break from all this nonsense, you might also find the wonders of fanfiction or furry music. This is dramatically less popular than artwork, as a picture is worth a thousand words and nobody wants to read a thousand. There is still a market for hack writers looking to cut their teeth on commissioned fetish work, a scene that is in dire need of actual talent, though you would pretty much give up all artistic integrity you have. You’ll have to trawl around for a good fanfiction writer compared to a good artist; they have almost no ways to advertise themselves.

“Furry” music has little to do thematically about being a furry, beyond using the fandom as a convenient basing – off point. You get the typical gamut of indie music, though mostly techno and electronica. My inexperience with such shows here, because I can’t even recommend you anything beyond the typical fare of “Renald Queenston”, who has done more for YouTube Poop than almost any other artist (see Intensive Care Unit, Rock My Emotions, Rainbow Tylenol, and Avast Your Ass).

Also worth mentioning is that the fanfiction and music scenes for bronies are vastly more developed than that of furries, thanks to them having a wealth of characters and media to base their works around, where furries are forced to make them out of thin air. This is how amazing musicians such as Silva Hound, Jackleapp, PinkiePieSwear, Interrobang Pie, Tarby, Chain Algorithm, and the tons of Pony Music Video remixers got their start. Once again, no need to look them up.

JackleApp’s “Seasons”, however, perfectly encapsulates the timeless, nostalgic thrill of being a brony at the time, with tearjerking songs about love and friendship. Just go in, ignore he’s talking about horses, and enjoy. Also, see the 10kB exposé about Silva Hound, who is just a plain brilliant house musician basing his career around pretty pastel ponies.

Why

I don’t think furries even understand themselves. Maybe it’s as simple as them enjoying being around people who like the same things they do. Perhaps they like cute things to the point where they want to spend a significant amount of time being around and jacking off to them, such as myself. It could be because of the incredibly supportive and queer – friendly community that understand the pain that every other furry goes through, whether it be depression or worse. Perhaps because it’s a community where everybody, despite all their differences, are actually equal, and how there are few places on Earth actually like that. Like the Internet’s own little Canada.

I don’t even know if being furry is a conscious choice or if it becomes part of one’s entire identity; asking around, you will definitely see the latter response more common, and I don’t know what I’d do if it weren’t for furries. They are brilliant people who have given me more things to love and feel inspired by than almost anything else I could possibly bring up. The fact that I’m just on the cusp of this fandom, being an outsider look in from its earliest days, makes being within it all the more exciting.

A lot of furries create fursonas; even I have a joke “frogsona” which I could commission someone to draw up at any time, with a personality basically just being a cockier version of yours truly. These tend to represent the furry’s ideal selves, being better, faster, stronger, than who they are in real life. A form of escapism, if you will, a variation of the “what’s your favourite animal” type of deal. Myself, I always answered “rat”, and I still have a special affinity for the buggers. But now I just want a good old dependable guard dog to love and protect.

When everybody is acting like who they want to be, everybody tends to be happier because of it. Nobody has to face the harsh reality of being an ugly thirty – year – old basement dweller pushing 250 pounds. Most furries are actually skinny little blokes, a bit like a speedrunner’s convention, though significantly more gay. Nobody has to deal with the inadequacies of the real world, for they are creating their own beautiful worlds to get to know and admire. Who wouldn’t want to be a part of that?

And for transgender and queer folk, you’ll never find a more welcoming place like this. Being against queers in the furry community will get your name blacklisted from damn near everywhere — as it should be. Of course, the downside is that some furries feel a need to be the protectors of the group, spreading things such as “drama” in a bid to support the needs of the gander. These include things like sexual assault allegations, commission scams, “art theft” (a ridiculous propagandist term), plagiarism, and anything that could possibly be seen as anti – copyright. Because of that last part, I was chased out of FurAffinity with a knife. Fucking cunts.

Drama tends to occur at the lowest level of the furry community, with the smallest of the small fry and those who don’t make their own artwork. Those with heavy commission schedules typically have to, you know, work, instead of partaking in such red herrings. This did not stop one enterprising My Little Pony porn artist from libeling me, calling me a “slimy scam salesman”, a “cult leader”, and a “Jim Jones wannabe” on their bestiality tumblr, where it got 600 notes before dying in obscurity. Jokes on him though: I got 5,000 free 10kB views. Take that, you horse – loving fuck.

Furry conventions are one of those things you have to visit once in your lifetime. I’ve never gone; only heard horror stories and tales of the alleged “fun times” which I no longer seek. It’s one of the only places in the world where you get to see dozens of fully – costumed animal people walk around in a parade while you get to talk to artists about their line of work in person, seeing the full extent of their social awkwardness. It’s one big hugbox, and everyone loves it. But for Christ’s sake, do not touch the fursuits without their permission. They will be pissed, and you might be rung up for harassment.

Rumours of rampant orgies in the convention hotels are kinky, though mostly unsubstantiated. A lot of sex is to be expected, yes, though nothing more wild than what you might find at say, Comic – Con or Games Done Quick. Mostly people are there to game, meet up with friends, and have a good time… or otherwise just gaze at the spectacle of the thing.

If one wants to know the average feelings of a sufficiently dedicated furry, look no further than furry_irl, Reddit’s top source for self – depreciating furry content. You’ll only get a lot of the jokes if you’re sufficiently furry enough, so consider it a litmus test to see if anything I’ve told you makes any sense whatsoever. And if you haven’t read the entire thing, shame on you for wasting my time with this 5,000 word masterpiece.

Fun fact: there’s a Reddit bot exclusively dedicated to finding mentions of “e621” and then giving a random e621 post to the commentator. Furries are so hedonistic that they have created a bot that will provide porn at the mere mention of pornography. Of course it only works in furry_irl, because the rest of Reddit has a strict no – fun – allowed doctrine.

Survey questions

Well, that should cover pretty much everything about the fandom. The rest you tend to pick up as you actually join within it; the furry fandom’s conversion rate is remarkably high as of now. All it takes is one sexy Pokémon or Undertale character, and bang. You’re hooked for life. It was ponies with socks for me; those damn horses and their attractive pink – and – pastel panties.

The problem I have with your survey questions is that they’re a bit incomplete, fitting of somebody with no experience with the fandom whatsoever. Most other surveys would be significantly more invasive and a lot less general, because a lot of furries already know what other furries are feeling and so wouldn’t write up questions that wouldn’t be uninteresting. But I’ll do what I can with my limited knowledge:

1. Are you a furry? Yes, silly.

1a. If you are a furry, how long have you been one and at what age? Oh, probably became a brony right in 2010 there, when the bronies starting running rampant. When the craze died down and I stopped being interested in My Little Pony, I bumbled around Tumblr for a while, got involved with more pony artwork, which ballooned into furry works like that of Animal Crossing and Pokémon. It was fitting that I was aware of furries since I was around eleven or so, back when there was still a strong hate or disgust towards them, choosing not to mind them at all… in fact, I might have met some on NationStates and Neopets, being fascinated with the idea of this “roleplay”, though never doing it myself. So it’s been about two to three years I’ve been a furry now, proud that I am to get to this point and to write enough to document this part of my life.

1b. Do other people know that you’re a furry? If so, how did they find out? Typically, no. The misconceptions are still there and so talking to people about them would be met with incredulity or more simple ignorance. You will find that in life, most people are stupid, and indeed don’t want to be educated… a dangerous trait that the human race has. But online it’s really no big deal, and in fact I like to make a lot of jokes about just how GAY it can be sometimes. I throw in references to furries, the porn, and the sites as often as I can, including that recent Galaxycat site review using an e621 mascot as the picture. I also name almost all of my fictional characters after artists I admire, and they tend to be furries more often than not, pornographic or otherwise.

1c. Would you ever want to buy a fursuit? How much would you be willing to spend on one? Please, no. I already have stuffed toys for my fur – based needs, and the idea of sweating alive in a giant suit is one unpleasant to me. I could do with a partial of a gay cat, but then I would feel like that guy on DeviantART on top of his car with the cat ears and tail. You know the picture. You see, I have a very twinkish body, though let’s be real, I’m bloody ugly! I belong to the tacky beard club and those bags under my eyes aren’t ever going away (spending long nights writing information like this, you see). I feel like acting out my hedonistic bisexual fantasies and being an anime catboy would be incredulous, at least until I get enough gains to be hot. How much would I spend? Not more than three weeks salary, I reckon.

1d. Have you ever been to a furry meet – up? If so, how did it go? Would you go again? No, though it sure would be one hell of an adventure. There is no chance of me ever going to the United States for a furry convention. It is a selfish country with disgusting capitalistic ideals, to the point where Canada’s biggest problem is being right next to them. The growing anti – Statesian discourse among Canadians makes it awkward to see so many Statesian artists online… can’t live with them, can’t live without them.

Is there any weird fetish stuff in the furry community? If so, what? Oh, my sweet summer child… Just browse e621 or the front page of FurAffinity. Then you will see the worst excesses of what humanity has to offer. Try not to get PTSD.

2. When and how did you first find out about furries? My memory is shot… no clue whatsoever. Probably on some Web forum somewhere, maybe even Encyclopedia Dramatica. None it even matters, truth be told.

2a. What did you first think about furries? Again, no clue. I mostly think of them now as cuddly and gay little nerds. The gay reputation is well – deserved; less than 25% of furries are straight, leading to joke about implementing “straight furry safe spaces”. Indeed, 11% are bisexual. Finally, I can be with my people!

3. Do you follow any furry subreddits, YouTubers, Twitter accounts, etc? Follow? No, no. I was addicted to Tumblr once before; not riding that rollercoaster again. Though I do like to stalk a furry’s social networks if I like them in order to get to know them despite having never met. If it sounds harsh, keep in mind they put it all up there voluntarily, and I’m just gleaning the most basic portions of their lives.

4. What is the best thing about the furry community? Being able to actually exist as I am and not have to change to what a bunch of straight white dude and dudettes want me to be. Being able to be a hedonistic bastard where nothing matters and you can do almost anything without consequence has its own Mad Max edge to it, where you will always find a community willing to support your hecked up fetishes, and there will always be porn of cute and cuddly animals for your most twisted, fucked – up philias, allowing you access to everything that in the real world either have you arrested or murdered by a lynch mob. In essence, furries save lives.

4b. What is the worst thing about the furry community? Motherfucking piece of shit libeling motherfuckers chasing me out of FurAffinity because I wanted to spread free culture fucking sons of bitches

6. Can you name your favourite furry cartoons/movies/anime/whatever? Oh, hell, everybody has that one thing where they’re like, “yep, I want to fuck that”. My memory is legitimately so bad I cannot remember what I wanted to bone last week, let alone a decade ago. But for what it’s worth, I think Spyro was one of those games that just gives you a warm and fuzzy feeling coming back to it, having a bunch of cute characters and beautiful worlds that make you appreciate the beauty that games provide. Also, there’s a dude who commissions tons of artwork of Spyro fucking a particular feral sheep, so that’s a thing occurring within our timeline.

Other blatant feel – good furry franchises are Animal Crossing, Dust: An Elysian Tail, Neopets, Pokémon, Digimon, and Hunter × Hunter, but only for that cutie – pie Cheadle.

7. What do you think about fursuits? Honestly I just want to hug one. It feels like an artificial reproduction of what an actual furry might be like… and yet we know that will never come to be, so we have to make do with the suits we create. They will always feel just a bit bigger than what you want, you know?

8. "All the Single Furries!" — best music video ever? I only know it by reputation. It’s famous for being included in every cringe comp ever, not understanding that it was supposed to be an in – joke among furries as just another cheesy thing. I don’t see personally what’s so embarrassing about some dudes in suits singing amateurishly over a Beyoncé song, but there’s no decency on this here Interweb.

9. What do you think about furries? Why do you think so? Idk sounds gay

10. Do you know any furries off – line? No, they’re all dead.

10b. Do you know any furries online? Yes, they’re all dying.

11. Yiff. Yes or no? ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

We live in a world where I have the privilege to talk to you with all this information, and you have the privilege to go forth and understand this brilliant, beautiful subculture, its own little country on the Internet, that nobody appreciates because they don’t get past the initial culture shock of understanding just what it is about furries that makes it such a doggone loving place to be in. It is the comfiest thing I have ever experienced in my life, and I wouldn’t give it up for anything — especially not the yiff.